Oval & Raj Bhavan

In the scandal involving a White House intern Monica Lewinsky, President Clinton finally admitted, “I did it”. Now Raj Bhavan occupant, N. D. Tiwari, resigns from his gubernatorial position of Governor of Andhra Pradesh on “health grounds”. What is not clear is how his health so suddenly deteriorated to warrant resignation! Even problems like AIDS are unlikely to cause such spontaneous decline in health.

NDTV wrote: After a Public Interest Litigation (PIL), the Andhra Pradesh High court asked the channel to stop telecast of the visuals. Raj Bhavan said the TV programme was 'fabricated, false and malicious', aimed at tarnishing the image of the Governor.

Are Raj Bhavan officials punishable for making false representations to Hon. High Court and getting court orders to stop the telecast and threaten action against the media? Is Hon. High Court accountable to public? Does the High Court have a moral and legal responsibility to ensure that the government, Raj Bhavan and police do not behave in a vindictive manner to cover up their own scandalous positions?

Statement After Nightcap

Making a statement after nightcap should be strictly forbidden. PC, not the IBM compatible or the later advanced varieties, recently made a grave mistake of making one after his nightcap, precisely during the midnight. Before he completed his statement, one of the largest states of India went into flames, which was already having some fires in some parts of the state, and in next few hours, they set several other parts of the country ablaze.

Readers of Tarantula are already familiar with the last lesson in Politics. The first lesson, however, is whenever a statement creates a problem for you or your high command, immediately deny it and throw the blame on media. By the time PC awoke next morning, it was far too late in the day, both literally and metaphorically, to retract for several reasons. Despite overcoming the hangover and HBS education, he could not recollect the first political lesson, however hard he tried. Others who were all eminently capable of reminding him were are all too busy in doing damage control. Hence, he could not withdraw his statement so far.

Now he is doing what is best under the circumstances; let others handle the situation and after all, silence continues to be golden.

Need for More States

There is an urgent need for more States in our great country. Democracy gives equal right to everyone to aspire for the coveted PM position and enter the books of history. Whether it is practical or impractical is not an issue for debate.

Since Independence, it is more or less clear that ‘democracy’ actually means that PM’s position is meant for only one family which can be rightfully obtained by dynastic succession only. It is true that there are some unpleasant gaps and situations where a proxy (or a non-politician, to be more precise) or an outsider had to be made PM. They are aberrations. They are exceptions, not a rule. At any point of time, India has heir apparent assuring us of the continuation of dynasty. Indians should be thankful to Him. On the other hand, thanks to the increasing sense of patriotism among young and old alike, more and more people are aspiring for political careers and positions to serve people to the best of their ability. Every politician harbors an ambition of becoming PM in order to serve people in a best possible manner and places his entire family also at the service of people to assure continuous service. Bereaved fills the political void immediately.

Pranab once openly expressed his desire to become PM and he was duly given the last lesson in politics: limit to loyalty is aspiring for the no. 2 position and beyond that it would be betrayal. All other politicians learnt this lesson by heart by now and started aspiring for next best only. Only other alternative is to have your own political party. Hence the demands for Central Cabinet positions, State CM positions and so. The impediment is that there were very few States in India to start with. Progressively, the numbers of States and Union Territories have nearly doubled in sixty years or so but that is hardly adequate way of keeping pace for a country having as many patriots like India.

This is essentially a demand-and-supply problem, to put it in management parlance. Besides, these demands for separate statehood are like nuclear reactions, generate more demands and faster and faster till the entire mass is annihilated. Tarantula, your blogger, makes two diametrically opposed suggestions.

The first one is an insane suggestion of abolishing the concept of statehood. Slogan should be One Country – One State – One Union Territory. India is one. Neighbors are welcome to emulate Sikkim and join One India Plan and get special privileges. This has the potential of solving inter-state disputes: a master stroke!

The other one is to declare every family an independent State with a rider that when a family splits into two or more families, for whatever reasons, they shall automatically get separate Statehood.

Value of My Vote

The beauty of democracy lies in the fact that it bestows the mandatory responsibility of electing the best of the worst candidates, which is misconstrued as a right. Most often people confuse between rights and responsibilities. In my humble opinion, the relationship between the voter and votee (person who receives vote) is as sacred as the one between disciple and teacher, devotee and God, spectator and cricketer or a movie goer and film star. It is too private to disclose but gap of well over three decades should be fair enough to voluntarily disclose the relationship, to use the catchword in the air.

In the post-emergency era, I got my first chance to vote and elect Dr. Subramanian Swamy from Chembur in the then Bombay (North East) constituency. Given the conditions prevailing in those days, it was a fair choice on my part; not that my vote made any difference. During that particular elections, anyone and everyone who stood against the ruling party won. My single vote, even if I had not cast or voted for the ruling party, would not have made iota of difference; it was such a historic election and perhaps the only one in the history of India in which voters understood and asserted their rights en masse. Being a virtual first timer, as my name did not figure in the earlier voter list (somehow bogus voters do not encounter such situations and their name appears enough times to vote as time permits), I was particularly enthusiastic in voting for a Harvard educated young man with a naive view that he will somehow understand my idealist view of the world and live up to it. Alas, it was not the case and he soon proved me utterly wrong.

All the subsequent elections proved to be a personal fiasco. After my initial success, which is not entirely attributable to my vote, every subsequent election proved a disaster for me. Not a single candidate of mine had ever won any election. People may think that it is too humiliating and that is the reason why I never even disclosed this secret aspect of my life to my wife. The fact is I am not afraid of accepting my failures to vote the winning candidates. It is a historically proven fact, that now onwards whoever gets my vote is sure to lose his/her deposit. What I am afraid is that politicians will lineup in front of my house during elections with a request to cast my vote to their opponent and offer me a hefty bribe.

Apartheid in Own Country

Biharis are unwanted in Maharashtra and now in MP. Am I correct in saying that Bihar is as much a part of India as are Maharashtra and MP? One should speak only in Marathi in Maharashtra and not in Hindi in Tamil Nadu. In Tamil Nadu, if your child does not study with Tamil Medium, he is not qualified to get any rank, even if he scores 1200/1200 or whatever is the upper limit. At this rate, one cannot live in some parts of his own country. Tomorrow, you cannot live in some districts (and a little later in other Talukas) of your own state and so on. Politicians may allow you to speak in your mother tongue only in your house, provided it is not audible outside. Taking cue from the direction in which we are proceeding, now every district will say that the people of other districts are not welcome. More interestingly, our friend Kapil Sibal is wooing Harvard, Yale and few other top-notch universities to set-up campuses in India. Raj will say Harvard, Mumbai has to publish their research findings in Marathi and KK will say that Yale, Chennai should publish in Tamil. This has its merits. Job opportunities for translators will increase rapidly.


I wonder whether Maharashtra, in particular Mumbai, would have been what it is today, without the enormous contributions made by non-maharastrians. Similarly, Hyderabad would not have made as much progress as it did without contributions from the people from other regions of Andhra. People are regionalised, marginalized, localized and dehumanized instead of nationalized, globalised and humanized.

Some people use the slogan ‘My India is Great’ whenever it is politically convenient. Similar and simpler slogans are catching up, thanks to their musical value and brevity. Why is it no one talks about Mother Earth and say Earth is my Mother and I shall live wherever I want? How many people realize that there is only one Earth and the boundaries are man-made? Has anyone noticed the joy of integration experienced by East & West Germanys twenty years ago despite the sacrifices involved on both the sides? These divisive politics are for creating more States; thus more CMs, more Ministers and more and faster opportunities to plunder the country.

In Andhra Pradesh, the demand for a separate Telangana state is there since AP was formed; may be even before. Essentially, AP constitutes three areas known as Telangana, Rayalaseema and Konaseema (Coastal Andhra). The ghost of enmity between these regions is created and perpetuated by the politicians. Gullible people are manipulated and threatened; employees are transferred and harassed. Rayalaseema is waiting and it will start demanding once Telangana becomes a state. In UP, MP, Bihar and elsewhere politicians have already succeeded in establishing new States as per their political convenience. They are plundering the regions with vigor. In our own country, we remain apartheid.

When it comes to Fish, How much is Big?

Few days back our beloved Prime Minister made a war cry: Catch the Big Fish. It is pleasant music to hear such a cry from him particularly because he is soft-spoken and hardly audible. Yesterday our Supreme Court, which is usually sober and business like, also echoed the same tune aloud. Read:

http://www.ndtv.com/news/india/supreme_court_on_madhu_koda_get_him.php

http://www.ndtv.com/news/india/will_madhu_koda_be_arrested_today.php

Both the PM and Supreme Court have echoed unity of purpose when they said, “go after big fish rather than small ones”. To be more specific, Supreme Court said it in the context of Madhu Koda.

Skeptics have a habit of reading too much between the lines. Now it is more or less clear that any fraudster in the region of Rs. 4,000 Crores falls in the category of big fish, from today's standards of Rupee's purchasing power. What about smaller fish below Rs. 4,000 Crores category? What is the cut-off limit for being branded as bigger fish? CBI is allowed to go after big, bigger and biggest fish, sharks and whales and so on or just confine to one big fish?

Despite the initial enthusiasm of all and sundry, our country has not successfully prosecuted any big and big plus category fish in last 62 years. No one was ever jailed, only detained for interrogation; no one’s property is confiscated; nothing was ever recovered from the fish’s associates i.e., co-fish.

If Rs. 70,00,000 Crores is stashed away in Swiss Banks, how many such fish are there – both dead and alive? What about the money stashed away in places other than Swiss Banks? Does the government have both the political willingness and moral righteousness to get back the money? What measures are proposed plug the avenues for corruption in future? What about Raja and his predecessors, who all supposedly used the same techniques and methodologies in spectrum sales?

Will anything ever come out of all this or just get prolonged and die natural death when Koda becomes a coalition partner in future? Or CBI will just drop the case in due course for want of evidence as in the earlier murder cases and scandals? Judges are Gods of Justice and hence talking about them would be blasphemy.

Hounding the Honest

Indians have long ceased to admire honesty. Read the news items:

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/biz/india-business/Lalit-Modi-Jagan-among-top-taxpayers/articleshow/5182297.cms

http://www.thehindu.com/2009/11/02/stories/2009110253770400.htm

“Jagan, who had paid just Rs 2.92 lakh tax for the entire financial year 2008-09, has paid Rs 6.6 crore advance tax in the first six months of this year, projecting a tax outgo of at least Rs 22 crore with his personal income expected to cross Rs 70 crore in 2009-10.”

"A contender for chief ministership of Andhra Pradesh, Jagan had paid no tax in H1 last year, but has paid Rs 6.6 crore in the first half this year. He is the only recognised politician in the top 100 taxpayers, according to sources."

Look at the very wording of these two news items. It is obnoxious, to say the least. Media and his political foes talk as though it is a sin to pay taxes. Personal income varies year after year and so does the tax liability; it is as simple as that. If Jagan’s estimated tax liability has gone up this year by a mere 75,342% it is due to his hardwork; sweat and blood. Fact that he paid it like an honest politician and became country’s highest tax paying politician overnight, toppling heavyweights like Mayawati, speaks volumes of his integrity. He deserves Bharat Ratna. Why is everyone hounding him? Talking behind his back? In front of him, they say he should be made CM! But for few honest people like him, revenues of Income-tax department would have exactly tallied with the taxes paid by the salaried class.

Perhaps his political allies and foes feel it is a sin to pay any taxes; even declaring a fraction of income and paying tax on it - a bad precedent, in any case - not the in thing. They want to influence the mind of one with an impressionable age as Jagan is. Politicians are there to serve people. Look at their pay-cheques! They are not even worth encashing. Do they get time to go to a bank and deposit when they are serving people 24x365? Then, where is the question of paying any Tax? In any case, what is tax on NIL income?

Voting

People have inculcated the bad habit of misconstruing everything a politician does. In a democracy, people have a constitutional duty to exercise their franchise - even if it means choosing the best of the worst candidates.

After weeks of promising the moon, on the polling eve, politicians provide masses what is required to keep them in high spirits. In order to ensure that people perform their duty, politicians spend a lot on incentives. On polling day, they provide vehicles to facilitate people coming to polling booth to discharge their duty. They tell you on what symbol to vote. All this is often misconstrued as bribing. No one has understood that it is a part of the process of educating the voter. Every voter has to go to poling booth and cast his/her vote. Invariably, more than half the voters do not do so. They would rather relax and enjoy the extra holiday declared under Negotiable Instruments Act. What will the rest of the world think about India? What message are we sending out to the world watching the spectacle of Polls in the world’s biggest democracy? What value system are we inculcating in the younger generation? Is it wrong on the part of politicians to try salvaging some prestige for the country? In order to save country’s image, our politicians send all their loyalists to booth to ensure 110% voting.

Allegation of Corruption is not Proof

Pranab Mukherjee said “Allegation of corruption is not proof”. Please read:
http://beta.thehindu.com/news/article40972.ece?homepage=true
What a Truism! Pranab said it in the context of CBI making some vague charges against the unknown! Making implicit charges against someone higher up? More so when A. Raja is following the same methodology as in the earlier instance? What do people and CBI expect? Not follow time-tested methods and be innovative every time? This is just ridiculous, to say the least.

Thankfully, we have judiciary to address such charges and declare the innocent as really innocent in due course. Justice always prevails. Our judiciary calls a Spade a Spade; never by any other name. If it is an intra-party matter, party high command is there to give a clean chit and close the issue. If it involves a judge, there is Parliament to abort the impeachment proceedings by mass absconding, under a party whip, thereby by proving the innocence of the judge who is facing the charges and prosecution by the media. One-step before that we have a collegium of eminent people who can remain indecisive to show some one of their ilk is innocent. Only weapon left to such innocent is to be silent.

The disturbing fact is that it took a spokes-person of Pranab’s caliber and eminence, albeit at the request of Raja, to teach the people of a simple truism. It is a pity that people do not even know such fundamental truths. No wonder census records say that India has maximum number of illiterates in the world.

People will never forgive CBI for harassing Ottavio Quattrocchi, an innocent man of impeccable character and contacts, for over two decades.

Perhaps the time is ripe to wind up CBI.

Recognising or Trumpeting?

Certain correlations found by chance arouse curiosity. Before we discuss further, look at the following details:

Hargobind Khorana Nobel (1968) Padma Vibhushan (1969) US-Citizen (1970)
Mother Teresa Nobel (1979) Bharat Ratna (1980) Padmashri (1962)
Subrahmanyan Chandrasekhar Nobel (1983) Padma Vibhushan (1968) US-Citizen (1953)
Satyajit Ray Hon. Oscar (1992) Bharat Ratna (1992, days after Oscar) Padma Vibhushan (1976) Padma Bhushan (1965) Padmashri (1958)
Amartya Sen Nobel (1998) Bharat Ratna (1999)
Rajendra Kumar Pachauri Nobel to IPCC (2007) Padma Vibhushan (2008), earlier received Padma Bhushan (2001)
S. R. Srinivasa Varadhan Abel (2007) Padma Bhushan (2008)
Look at these notable Indians. Except Dr. Chandrasekhar, their highest recognition by the Government of India has come soon after receiving an international award like Nobel Prize or Abel Prize or Honorary Oscar for lifetime achievement. Dr. Chandrasekhar’s case is somewhat atypical in the sense Nobel Prize awarding committee took several decades to honor him and it was highly belated.

From these facts, it looks like that the Government of India has no mechanism to understand the achievements of people to recognise and reward them at appropriate time. Probably some of these people are unknown entities to GOI until they got recognition from an international forum.

Mother Teresa's Missionaries of Charity, Kolkata is doing commendable job all over the world and largely in India since 1950. Chandrasekhar Limit is there for over 75 years now! Amartya Sen is known to be a finest thinker of our times. Indians and GOI have no clue about what an Abel Prize means to any mathematician. Based on the historical reactions of GOI, Prof. Venktaraman Ramakrishnan, may expect Padma Vibhushan in the next list.

Is GOI recognizing the sons/daughters of the soil or just trumpeting after reading news? If it has an appropriate system in place and national awards are given on no consideration other than merit, how did many of them went unnoticed until they got a Nobel Prize or such similar recognition?

Mahatma Gandhi

Mahatma Gandhi, had he been alive, would have celebrated 140th birthday today. Perhaps, not! Guiness World Records would have recorded him as oldest living person on earth.

I always wonder, what would be the state of his body, mind and soul, if he were really alive. One possible scenario is like this:

Being a grand-old man of clean habits, must be having a very frail physique with healthy body. Must be having restless mind and troubled soul. Must be regretting having lead the Independence struggle. Must be feeling ashamed of our politicians. Must be shaking his head in shame at the conduct of our MPs in parliament and MLAs in Assembly. Must have been dismayed at the fact that India figures in as one of the most corrupt countries in the world. Must have got disgusted with the figure of R. 70,00,000 crores stashed away in a Swiss Bank. Must be looking into dictionary for the meaning of Z-plus category security for politicians. Must have been uncomfortable at the fact that some of the cells in Beur and Tihar Jails are virtually refurbished to give 5-star comforts to some politicians with BMI over 60. Must be having difficulty in raising his head to get the glimpse of high new generation statues. Must be living in a very small but clean and neat room somewhere in the country as his ashram would habe been grabbed by landsharks by this time. A Tamrapatra must have been kept in a hidden corner and a pension book worth Rs. 1,000/- p.m. or so given to heroes of freedom struggle would have been stashed away somewhere. Must have stopped long walks and writing as some of his great-grand children would have sold away his worn out chappals and good old fountain pen by this time. Would he be regretting having born an Indian? It is difficult to say. Must have been worried why He had not given him deliverance so far and praying everyday for it. Must be introspecting whether he unknowingly committed any sins in His eyes.....

In His infinite wisdom, in less than six months after the independence, He deemed it fit to give Mahatma Gandhi moksha, lest it would have been intolerable for him to live in independent India any longer, after having received his last prayers, albeit in a shocking manner, through the hands of Godse.....

Oliver Wants More

"Please, sir, I want some more." So asks Oliver in Oliver Twist, a novel by Charles Dickens. That was 171 years ago. Literary world is yet to recover from the shock. Now it is IIT and IIM professors asking for more! More shocking!!!

Essentials of a Teacher are: i) he is giver of knowledge ii) he should be hungry to learn more so that he can teach more iii) he should not ask and be content with what is given to him/her. This point alone needs some elucidation.

Gurubrahma – “Teacher is Creator”. How can Creator ask or demand more? What are our scriptures teaching in this regard? Take the examples: Vamana wanted no more than three strides of land from Emperor Bali even though the latter offered more; Lord Rama took partly eaten (already tasted) fruits from Sabari and never complained; Lord Krishna happily took a fist-full of inexpensive flat-rice from Sudama. Teacher is expected to set such equally divine example and be content with what is given. They need not even read epics to learn such a mundane rule. Learn from our politicians. Most Chief Ministers take half-pay or only a day’s wage a month or some take One Rupee a month as a token salary, out of respect for motherland. Now our Congress MLAs are taking only half-pay. Babus are travelling only business/economy, not executive class. One young MP travelled by train. One minister travelled low-cost airliner. One minister, albeit unwillingly, travelled cattle-class. They are all renouncing their rights and privileges and Teachers asking more? If our Politicians are content with less, why are these Professors dissatisfied with their regular pay? This defies all logic.

One or two people in the country grumbled about the double standards of the Government in dealing with the demands of Professors and Air India pilots. One spokesperson of Ministry of Civil Aviation clarified:

“These critics are an ill-informed lot. In the first place, they should know that the subject matter pertains to two independent ministries and hence there is no question of double standards. Next consideration is Professors are down-to-earth and grounded lot. Our commercial Pilots, everyone must know by this time, fly up to high altitude of 40,000 feet and they are all highflyers.”

Ottavio Quattrocchi

What a relief! Finally, the Government of India has closed the Q-files and informed Supreme Court accordingly. Justice will prevail as Supreme Court consigns the files to archives in a matter of a day or two. Ottavio Quattrocchi had undergone two-decade long unfair trial, mostly by the vindictive media. The attempts to extradite him to India have been futile. CBI lost extradition case and had to pay for his legal expenses. His bank accounts were frozen by CBI and defrozen by Law Ministry; he was arrested and released elsewhere and he had undergone ill-treatment, as though he is a common criminal. No, he was not. He is a respectable Italian Businessman. For his acquaintance with a co-citizen Ms. Antonia Maino, how can he be treated so harshly in India? If it is so unpardonable, all her present 1.2 billion co-citizens, friends, followers and admirers in India are equally guilty.


Satyameva Jayate means "Truth Alone Triumphs".

Mr. Narasimhan Ram (also known as N. Ram and fondly known as Ram), editor in chief of the The Hindu daily now is a well-known journalist of L’affaire Bofors fame. He received Asian Investigative Journalist of the Year (1990) for “searching for the truth in the then famous Bofors Case”. He published dozens of documents on daily basis in a serial form on the front and inner pages of The Hindu replete with annotations and detailed serialized articles for over a month in his capacity as a key member of editorial board and also went on record saying “we have hundreds of documents related to the scandal but will not reveal their source”. Ram got enlightenment. Enlightenment has the curious habit of dawing spontaneously, without a warning! One day The Hindu abruptly stopped referring to Bofors scandal whithout any explanation to its readers. Later, Ram received Padma Bhushan (1990).

Indian Government has a moral obligation to compensate Quattrocchi for the mental agony he had gone through for two long decades. He faced it like a man and came out clean. India should send a clear message to the world that Indian ethos and injustice will never go together by conferring Bharat Ratna on him.

Right to get Ph.D Act

We know the fast-paced reforms the Indian Educational System has gone through prior to the 100th day celebration of Kapil Sibal becoming HRD minister. There is so much to admire and it takes very many blogs. In the present one, we shall confine only to reforms related to PhDs.



Recently Sibal made it clear in no uncertain terms that First Class Ph.D is mandatory for a teaching position in IIT or IIM from now onwards. He is always true to his word; having said something once, he is not known retract – come what may. He is integrity personified; most others say something and immediately throw blame on media as though they have not said what they have actually said. Worse still, they insist they have said what they have not. Besides, there is pressure from all MLAs and MLCs for at least one IIT and IIM in each assembly constituency and more where ruling party's candidate has come from. MPs from both the Houses are demanding at least one IISc, AIIMS etc. in each parliamentary constituency. Sibal is known to be pro-active. He had foreseen massive demand for first-class PhDs and burning his midnight oil to bring in Right to get Ph.D. Act in next session of Parliament. One must understand the patriotism of Sibal. He is a firm believer of US adage that number of PhDs has a direct correlation with the growth and well being of the nation. He would have learnt about it during his HLS days. In a country where absolutely preventable crisis is allowed to occur routinely, his zeal to be proactive is most welcome. How I wish other ministers emulate his work culture!



Preparing an Act of this magnitude is not as easy as writing one of the Acts in any Shakespeare’s play, be it a tragedy or comedy. Lot of thinking goes into it. All loose ends have to be tied up, uphold the exsting practices and so on. Reliable sources have shared latest version of the draft (a) to (z) of the proposed Right to get Ph.D. Act, which is obviously being fine-tuned. Here it is:

Preamble to the Act: It is necessitated to introduce Class/Grade system for PhDs which is hitherto unheard of in any part of the world and thereby become a role model in the reforms of higher education to the rest of the world. In order to meet the anticipated growth in demand for First class PhDs and to make India pro-actively self reliant and keep it on fast-track of growth path, the Right to get PhD Act is envisaged.



a) All Indian citizens and PIOs who celebrated 21st birthday in any preceding year are bestowed with inalienable right to get a Ph.D degree under this act from the date and time this Act is enacted.

b) All eligible candidates are bestowed with the choice of getting PhD as per methods in vogue from any recognized or unrecognized or on-paper or paper-less or name-less or web-based or address-less or non-existing or defunct or disgraced or any other known or hitherto unknown class of University in addition to non-contact or distance education and they have constitutional guarantee that there shall be no discrimination.

c) Candidate may exercise his/her right to appoint his/her kith and kin or relatives or friends or followers as i) thesis advisor ii) external examiner for evaluation of thesis with a rider that the external examiner should have resided external to the native city/town/village of the examinee at least for a day iii) panel members for viva voce.

d) Not withstanding the provisions under (c), candidate shall have a choice of submitting his thesis or otherwise.

e) Those who submit thesis under the proviso (d) shall get the constitutional guarantee of First Class or above and those who chose otherwise shall be deemed to be First Class till the day of convocation and a regular First Class from the date and time of convocation. This also has constitutional guarantee that there shall be no discrimination.

f) Candidate desirous of submitting the thesis of some other scholar available on web should only submit the link and not the entire attachment. This link shall be deemed to be the original thesis of the candidate.

g) While the paper-less form submitting thesis is preferable for environmental considerations; complete or incomplete; accepted or rejected thesis of earlier scholars may also be submitted with or without any alterations provided the name of the candidate is suitably altered only after the application of whitener fluid. Candidates are encouraged to retain the original title of the thesis. Such thesis is considered to be the original work of the candidate.

h) to x) ....

y) All prevailing reservation laws apply.

z) For the purpose of teaching employment in IITs, IIMs or any other institution for higher learning, PhDs received under the proviso of this Act shall be pari passu with any ivy-league or any other foreign university other than those in Pakistan.

Money: the Fifth Dimension of Universe

In one of the earlier blogs titled Flyovers, I happened to use the phrase ‘money continuum’. Inadvertently I spilled the beans. Many of my friends, particularly the Classical Physicists and Relativity experts, have taken a serious objection to the idea of my fifth dimension and that too connecting it to something like money which is more relevant to today's materialistic world and certainly not to pure Science. Going by the advances made in Science till date, very concept of money as a dimension appears nonsensical to say the least. I definitely owe an explanation, but not an apology to my discerning readers.

We know Albert Einstein’s quest to understand the ultimate Universal Truth is incomplete despite the fact that his life at 112, Mercer Street was spent entirely to prove it mathematically. All great physicists of his era were overawed by the beauty of his equations but were unanimous in their polite disagreement. Till now, Hawking and Penrose are having roadblocks in their models of Universes. Clearly something is amiss here.

At home, Indian philosophers for long and post independence Indian Politicians in short span of time have made considerable gains in Spiritual Universe and Materialistic Universe respectively. As a keen observer of various systems of thought, I realized that the Ultimate Universal Truth can only be explained, beyond any doubt, by fully integrating these three systems of thought: The meeting of minds and philosophies of East and West; past and present! I am researching in this area. It may please be appreciated that it would be premature on my part to disclose my findings here before publishing at least on the cover page of PNAS. For this reason, I am not giving away my proofs. Out there, there are too many Watsons on prowl to purloin my findings and later get a medal, citation and a fat cheque apart from cornering the glory without deserving. I owe something to my readers and friends: here is a rough outline.

Indian Philosophy states Universal Truth (= Ultimate Truth) is congruent to Bliss (anadobrahma means Bliss is Universe and vice versa). Post independence Indian Political Philosophy knew all the while (it is a well kept secret) that Bliss has no existence without the dimension of money and existance without money = non-existance. None of Einstein’s theories have factored the dimension of money. Being simplicity personified, he was content with only space and time. You can't balme him.

By extending space-time continuum, 4 dimensional model of Einstein, with this fifth dimension popularly known as money, we get a complete, stable and cohesive model of Universe. One can never realize the Ultimate Truth of the Universe (=Bliss) without this added dimension! For minor details and proofs, please browse future journals. Q.E.D.

Now we know the secret of missing dimension and where it lies.

Flyoevrs

Flyovers have some positive traits. They keep Contractors, Babus and Politicians happy. They keep public both happy and unhappy depending on the space, time and money continuums. During the construction time of any flyover, people are somewhat unhappy as it impedes the traffic thereby takes more time to pass through the area, space available on road for hawkers becomes limited and business (money) in surrounding areas gets effected and so on. Once the debris is cleared and flyover is inaugurated by politicians and suitably named after a current generation politician from a family of politicians, people are somewhat happy as they can commute in lesser time, at least for next few days and save a little on petrol (money) and also the space below flyovers becomes available for extra-curricular activities. Some Hyderabadis are sure to disagree; they argue that it is difficult to get away from traffic jam on the flyover. They do have a valid point there. Some motor-cyclists complain that not all flyovers are suitable for their daily acrobatics and aerobatics and they are so much unlike necklace road which gives them a long reckless driving pleasure. Set aside these minor grouses, people are generally very happy to have at least something concrete worth few lacs for a project costing thousands of crores to the exchequer. Indians have learned to be happy and content; it has not come easy or too soon, it is all hard learning and took centuries of disciplined upbringing by ancestors. We are living in an era where, as a rule, most projects worth thousands of crores do not leave any trace behind. They are cleanly executed. Some projects have the knack of getting fully completed on paper before starting. This is all the more reason for people to be happy with flyovers. Just to sum it up, it is a win-win situation to all concerned.

Believe me, these Flyovers are thinking beings. They do have thought process of their own. The fact is, from very early stages they start thinking in English! Local vernacular would have been better. Alas! It is not so. I am not joking. Their logic goes somewhat on these lines: if they are known as flyover, why shouldn’t they try to fly over? It is complicated, a bit absurd and splitting the word to a perverse end from our point of view. Aerodynamic laws do not permit them even to take off! Simply they are not good students of science.

Nevertheless they do try to fly over their surroundings. The flyovers in the making are even naughty; they try to fly before they are ready. This is what exactly causing the collapse of flyovers and bridges, both during the construction and soon after, in all metros and in the whole of the country; a poor low paid site construction engineer gets arrested by police for no fault of his.

Premier Educational Institutes & Autonomy

I don’t recall any Union Budget which has not tampered with the duties on tobacco products over last four decades and more i.e., ever since I started reading the budget speeches. Every Finance Minister is addicted to increasing the taxes while only some people are addicted to tobacco products. The point is addiction exists and it is contagious. HRD ministry and Health Ministry are no exceptions. They are addicted to tamper the higher education of which they have no understanding.

Recollect the ordeal faced by the director of AIIMS not so long ago. Supreme Court had to intervene to give some solace by negating what parliament did by rallying around Health Minister blindly. Arjun Singh clearly had the better of IIMs and taught them what management is all about. I wonder if all IIMs collectively failed to manage Arjun Singh, even though illustriuos people were chairing their respective boards, what can they possibly teach at IIMs in the classroom. Their collective failure in itself is a good case study for IIM students. Giving a lecture to a bunch of kids with 99.9X percentile in CAT is a cake walk and putting into practice and demonstrating is different. They are all wizards in their subjects but when it comes to dealing the politicians, even collectively, they are just as inept as the next man.

In the present imbroglio at IITs, I wonder why IIMs are not actively involved and also the safe distance IISc, ISI and AIIMS are keeping. I am not suggesting that they should form a trade union but if they have common issues why not express at a common forum?

I do have some vague idea why TIFR has not figured anywhere. Fortunately, right from its inception, it has rightfully enjoyed a special status. TIFR owes everything to Homi J. Bhabha and Jawaharlal Nehru as these visionaries (have they anticipated 2009 events at a time when Kapil Sibal was just a toddler?) ensured that TIFR and subsequently BARC become part of DAE which has been traditionally a domain of PM considering the sensitivities involved in the work. Other ministries think twice, perhaps more, before poking their nose.

IITs, IIMs, IISc, AIIMS and ISI should jointly put up a simpler charter of demands i) autonomy ii) better pay-scales and non-negotiable iii) shift to DAE from HRD/Health ministries so that these institutes come under PM which leaves lesser scope to meddlers of higher education. The third point has a long term impact in the sense the academia will have time to concentrate on their work instead of fighting with persons of Kapil Sibal’s ilk after each cabinet reshuffle. I hope the point is clear.

Colored Money & D-15 Problem of Swiss Bank

Most of us have been hearing about Rupees 70,00,000 Crores of money stashed away in Swiss Bank by very few Indians and political parties. Some of the readers in the other parts of the world should know that in India, a crore means 10 million. There is no need to confuse people by expressing this number in billions or trillions since UK and US friends will interpret differently. Being a hardcore IT (not Income Tax) person with some grey hair, I developed a phobia that poorly written programs and ill-designed systems would collapse any Pico-second. The trauma of Y2K just about a decade back is still fresh in my memory even though I called it a day nearly 1K days back.

Very recently Pranab Mukherjee made his usual courtesy call and asked the director of Swiss Bank about the current balance as his system is down due to power shortage in New Delhi. Usually affable director retorted saying don’t throw your telephone directory at me. Clearly Pranab would not think of doing that at a friend sitting some 5K miles away when he is not adept at throwing even in the dust bin kept next to his table. Understandably, Pranab was aghast.

Obviously there is a crisis at Swiss Bank and we need to get to the root of the problem.

Swiss banks are known for keeping secrecy. If you are not good at keeping a secret, kindly stop reading now.

It is learnt from reliable sources that CIO of Swiss Bank was discussing a statement indicating the total of Indian money of some dark color just when Pranab’s call came in. Both the CIO and the director were in a jam as the collapse of their system is imminent. The rate at which the balance is swelling, the amount would cross 99,99,999.99 crores at any micro-second meaning it exceeds 14 digits and becomes a 15 digit figure.

So, what? Actual problem is here. CIO was explaining that very moment their computerized color banking system is so designed to take only 14-digit numbers (fractions do not pose much problems). They also discovered dynamite like bug in the system which resets entire balance to zero due to what is technically known as overflow problem, once the balance becomes 15 digits. Incidentally this vindicates my right to have my own phobias. It is a poor system design but obviously they can not let the customers know of it; clients will move their funds away electronically, with a click of a mouse, to competing Banks which leads to natural collapse of the Swiss Bank just as so many other US banks collapsed recently for wrong reasons. This is the real reason why director lost his cool which you can reasonably expect him to regain only after this D-15 problem is resolved by re-designing the system with a new RDBMS engine which can handle figures with any number of digits on the fly and retain Indian clients.

Cattle & Shashi Tharoor

We have been reading so much about Shashi Tharoor’s tweeting. Is it Much Ado About Nothing? Our ever forgiving PM did what any nice person like him would do without batting an eyelid. Sonia being a disciplinarian, like most moms, may deal with the matter differently. Lot of discussion in papers and on TV is centered on the technology used, right or wrong aspects; also to some extent whether his tweeting is offensive.

In this debate people forgot which one is the offended party.

We can’t really find fault with anyone for the simple reason there is no well defined way of communicating with Cattle and elicit their feelings on the subject. One expert, who prefers to remain anonymous as he is afraid of TV reporters, interviewed several cattle with his extra-ordinary skills in communicating with them.

It turned out that cattle did not like Tharoor to travel in their class and somehow he got the scent. Thinking cattle would never know, he played smart by tweeting. Now the cat is out of the bag.

Sibal-ising the Education in India

The truth is our politicians believe that excellence in education will eventually lead to problems for them. They have been countering this in a planned way. Now you have more IITs, IIMs, B-schools and engineering colleges (with additional seats) and so on with 50% Engineering/MCA seats going unfilled in India. 85% of the graduates, as per a study, are unemployable (that’s the word for unfit for a job). Andhra alone churns out 45,000 MBAs every year without having an IIM.

By denying what is due to faculty members of institutions like IITs, IIMs, IISc, ISI and so on they hope to eventually normalize and bring these institutions on par with other mediocre colleges (i.e., national standards). Taking away autonomy, increasing reservations should be understood in the context of vote bank politics.

By the way who owns most of the engineering colleges and b-schools that have come up over past two decades? It is politicians and their followers. How many people know that a large percentage of these institutions are owned by (country made) liquor barons (not Vijay Mallya variety)? It is a pity nobody understands their spirit to improve education in India. Well, part of these liquid assets and colored money, instead of going into already swollen Swiss accounts, is getting invested in Sibal-sed system of education - is it not something to cheer about? Look, we have already forgotten the foundation laid by Arjun Singh just a couple of years back in teaching IIMs what management is all about!

Politics of Statues

This refers to a recent PIL Against the proposed Statue in the Ocean to the memory of Shri Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj in Hon. High Court of Mumbai.

A precedent was set by politicians in Tamil Nadu sometime back which has gone unnoticed. Vivekananda Rock Memorial is familiar to many for its historical and cultural significance and remains a major tourist attraction of Kanyakumari. Recent addition of 133’ high (to represent 133 chapters of Thirukkural) Thiruvalluvar statue simply dwarfs the rock memorial. Just take a look at any photo available on web. I have great respect for Saint Thiruvalluvar for his teachings are relevant to even present day corporate governance and today’s life style.

It is a political move to dwarf a national memorial and draw attention to another as a part of vote-bank tactics and politics of hatred. I wonder whether anyone ever questioned this. If the idea is to have a befitting statue to a saint, surely they could have found any number of locations.



Mayawati institutionalized statue erection process and has taken it to sublime level. In a different way, recently the state governments of Tamil Nadu and Karnataka displayed maturity and statesmanship in signing truce to stop decades old war-of-statues between them and entered into a collaboration of unveiling statues in each other’s state with the participation of statesman of both the states. With this inter-state water disputes have taken a back seat. Bereaved state of Andhra Pradesh is seriously planning a memorial (obviously with a statue) for late YSR. Nothing short of it will be befitting as around 500 people have committed suicide or died of heart attack on watching the helicopter debris on TV.

The era of 6’ size statues for Gandhi, Nehru and Ambedkar is clearly on wane. It is positive sign in the sense our politicians have realized the need to live in present. Now dawns the new era of global size statues with Olympic size budgets. This clearly defines a new paradigm and a quantum leap in the thinking process of our wise politicians.

Since I am not in the profession of politics my dream may remain largely unrealized. I had a dream to utilize 0.0000001% black money lying in one of Swiss Banks to erect a statue of one of our late national leaders on Mount Everest so that his direct glance will bless the entire nation. Beijing may not view my idea sympathetically as the shadow is bound to fall on their nation.